Lusty Lady Playday

Sunday morning I awoke stiff and sore, completely depleted from the long physically intense day I endured before. Saturday October 16th we Lusty gals hosted Playday, a 16 hour long in house party for which we have the rare opportunity to come outside of the glass to play. Under old management Playday was set on the slowest day of the year and owners essentially pulled their hands out of the business and allowed the dancers to do whatever they could do to make as much money as possible with the incentive that the dancers would be able to keep it all as a "Christimas Bonus" of sorts. Manipulative yet creative, the dancers turned the tradition into one of self empowerment and an opportunity to promote the business after the cooperativization. Year after year dancers and support staff would create a safe space for performers and faithful patrons to interact more personally and creatively, an event as much about building community within SF as it was about the immediate needs of the co-op members themselves.

Unfortunately internal efforts were needed elsewhere and the Lusty party was left to the wayside for 3 years, but never forgotten. Customers repeatedly requested the event and tenured dancers remembering the party's positive attributes influenced the Lusty masses to bring it back to the old theatre. Community minded and part of PR committee I was able to be a part of bringing this notable event back, and as tired as the effort made me, I couldn't be happier with the results. 10 percent of the door proceeds were given to St. James Infirmary, noted sexologist Dr. Carol Queen made a brief appearance on our live stage and was an open ear to dancer's ideas and dreams for world more receptive to sex worker needs and rights, and the Lusty Ladies experienced a comradery building opportunity unlike anything I've seen before.

This is why I work the Lusty Lady Peepshow theatre. I love my co-workers, my community, and the cross-pollination of ideas and forms of expression that can occur with only a little bit of nudging. Bruised and battered after the intense workout I still can't help but relish the tremendous benefit that comes with it.

Kiss and Tell

If you peruse my blog entries you will find truly sexually explicit content quite rare, although many of the topics are sexual in nature. While I have abandoned blog drafts and half-finished handwritten journal entries reflecting more scandalous and intimate material, I have steered clear of posting these things for the protection of partner's and co-worker's identities and feelings and my own personal boundaries. Sorry, dear readers (if there actually are any), I hate to disappoint, but I have never been a girl to kiss and tell.

I can tell you I am quite enjoying my half-secret fantastically realistic fairy-tale life through which I am able to express myself whole-heartily on so many many levels. Thanks to friends, partners, and my own sense of wonder I am experiencing a plethora of wild and amazing things that I often shake with the desire to share with the world but I have to refrain. I am an exhibitionist, yes, but I am also a big fan of controlled environments and an internet blog just does not make the cut.

Furthermore, if you happen to be disappointed, I have to state that revealing play-by-plays of my late night soirees and fantasies has never been the purpose of my public blog. My intention is to bring a melding of self reflection and academic analysis of my experiences as a whole, using more revealing and specific information in order to support larger themes and ideas, never at the expense of others in the process.

Finding the balance between sharing exciting experiences and revealing a series of raunchy stories can sometimes be difficult, yet to exhibit without meditation or care for others is the easy way out. It may be bold to share every detail of my sex life but I couldn't say that work would be contributing to any sort of positive end.

Decisions Decisions

Yay, I am officially done with the LSATs and I don't think I did too terribly on them, alas I will not know until November 1st. Next step to figuring out my life in this next year is to start gathering law school applications and letters of recommendation, writing and editing my admission' essays, and start making some decisions. While there is really only one family member pushing me to go back to school asap, I'm still quite unsure about what I want to do. On one hand I would love to be out and done with law school by the time I'm 24, but I also feel to young to start such a heavy career and I don't want to give up my lifestyle. I really feel like I am able to find myself now, center on what is important to me, and identify with others better than ever before, which I'm afraid may all be lost, or at least placed on a long hold, if I were to go back immediately.

Being a child borne of chaos I actively strove for schedule and stability, through high school and college, in all facets of my life. I rushed through my college experience, planning everything from my first year to the last. The past year, some of which has been spent still in school, I have never felt more grounded or centered while being less self-contained and active in the world around me and I'm certainly not ready to risk having anything stunted. Part of me thinks this fear is unfounded and that change can only happen if I want it to, but the thought of it possibly being inevitable with a heavier study load and additional rigor to my everyday agenda keeps creeping in on me.

Spontaneity, creativity, and progression have spoiled me I suppose.

Photography

I finally recieved unedited files of the two photoshoots I participated in with fellow Lusties and models Kitty McMuffin and Tempest with photographer John Gatta. Want to see?